Q. How many Klingons does it take to change a light panel?
A. Two. One to change the panel, the other one to shoot him and take all the credit.
Q. How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. Just 2. The trick's getting them in there.
Q: How many Oxford dons does it take to change a light bulb?
A: "Change"?!?!??!!? What do you mean "change"?!!?!
Q: How many philosophers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Well it depends what you mean by light bulb.
Q: How many Microsoft engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. Just buy out everyone who's done it before.
How many gorillas does it take to change a lightbulb?
One gorilla, but a hell of a lot of lightbulbs
How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
It depends. Does the lightbulb feel ready to change?
How many posh people does it take to change a lightbulb?
Change a what?
How many posh people does it take to change a lightbulb?
One to demand the butler telephones an electrician and another to pour the gin and tonics.
How many Marxists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because the light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
Oxbridge grads?
Just the one - he holds the bulb and the world rotates around him.
Q: How many Microsoft engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. Just buy out everyone who's done it before.
OR None. They just define darkness as the industry standard.
How many folk singers....
Five. On to change it and four to sing about how good it used to be in the days of the old lightbulb.
Q - How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A - Fish
q. how many builders does it take to change a light bulb?
sucks through teeth - ooh if only it was just the bulb
How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but we can't get the parts till July. If you want,
I can call my mate Dave and see what he can do, but it's gonna cost ya.
How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
Juan.
How many new labour members does it take to change a lightbulb?
All of them. One to hold it, and the rest to turn to the right.
Q How many Elephants does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. One. They're not stupid.
Q. How many Floridians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. Don't know for sure, they're still counting.
How many quantum physicists does it take to change a lighbulb?
It's impossible to be certain.
How many tech support people does it take to change a light bulb?
Well, we have exactly the same system here, and the light bulb is working fine...
Have you tried turning it off and back on again?
How many computer programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, it's a hardware problem.
How many goths does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they like to sit in the dark....
How many bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four.
One to change it, and three to complain that it's electric.
How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a lightbulb?
YOU CAN'T KNOW, MAN, YOU WEREN'T THERE!
How many existentialists does it take to change a light bulb?
2: One to change the bulb, the other to observe how the light bulb itself represents a single incandescant beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of absurdity reaching out towards a vast maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
How many Zen buddhists does it take to change a lightbulb?
The sky is blue and the grass is green.
How many Zen Buddhists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two; one to change the light bulb, and one not to change the light bulb.
How many sound engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, two, one, two...
How many Socialist Workers?
We don't want to change the lightbulb, comrade. We want to smash it!
How many shopkeepers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. It was alright when I sold it to you.
How many Hollywood movie studio executives does it take to change a lightbulb?
Does it have to be a lightbulb?
Q - How many aerospace engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
A - None. It doesn't take a rocket scientist, you know.
A - One.
Q - How many psychics does it take to change a light bulb?
How many actors does it take cto change a light bulb?
One to go up the ladder and 4 to stand at the bottom shouting "It should be me up there!"
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